Life is an ongoing learning process, every experience and situation is shaping us. There is a lesson in everything and if we start to see and embrace them, they will help us grow.
Here are some lessons or better yet ‘realizations’ I had over the years, that I would love to share with you.
1. If you don't love yourself, no one else will!
I started Modeling at an age of 15 and it has been a tough business. First of all, I am very grateful that I have had the opportunity to do what I do, it opened many doors for me. Modeling gave me the opportunity to travel, to see the world and to expand my horizon. It has and continues to confront me with many challenges, which help me to grow. I wouldn't be where I am today without modeling.
BUT... it is a tough and superficial business where people judge and reject you on a daily bases. It causes You to question yourself A LOT and you always have to rebuild the belief in yourself. You have to develop a thick skin and try to not take things personal, which is very hard, and I am honestly still struggling with it.
My lesson from this whole experience is the importance how to truly love yourself. If you love yourself, you will radiate it outwards. Everybody has it, the chattering and criticizing voice in their head telling them things like: “You are not good enough” or “You will never be able to reach your goals”. The fact is, that this voice isn't serving you and instead is blocking you in many ways. Would you want to be friends with someone who is constantly trying to make you small? No, you would want to be friends with somebody who is listening to you and is up lifting.
I observed that many of my fears, insecurities and self limiting beliefs were based on my lack of self-love.
So what does it mean to love yourself? In my opinion, loving yourself means taking good care of yourself, which includes eating good food, taking care of your body, being active and listening to yourself. Furthermore, it is important to create healthy boundaries and learn to say no! I often find myself, having a hard time saying no, because I don't want to be impolite. Even though, if somebody is crossing your personal space, it is your right to say no. It seems hard at first, but by working to stand up for yourself, you will feel empowered.
Loving yourself also means becoming conscious about your self-talk!
We often don't realize how hard we are on ourselves! The negative self-talk seems normal to us, but by doing it that we disempower ourselves even more.
I learnt that you are the creator of your life and that you have the power to change your thoughts. If you can create disempowering thoughts, you are also able to create loving and supportive thoughts.
Ask yourself: “How do I want to feel?” And “Which thoughts and beliefs would support it?” It feels strange and like a lie at first, the negative voice will try to fight against it, but with time and dedication they will transform in a beautiful way.
I am working daily on becoming more conscious about my thoughts through journaling, meditation and affirmations. Of course some days I feel better than others, but it is about consistency and taking small steps that move you forward.
Finally, I would say that loving yourself is all about respecting yourself and that you make decisions that feel good for you.
I am curious what it means for you to love yourself?
2. People love to talk, no matter what you do!
It actually doesn't matter what you are doing, if you are working on a big career or you are just chilling out in life. If People want to talk about you, they will find a reason for it. I personally made peace with it and for me “the talk” is just mirroring their own insecurities.
Why should you invest your limited amount of energy in talking about other people if instead you could invest the time in yourself?
Furthermore, think about the amount of energy you wasted when you got upset about what other people said about you. It's simply not worth it, it is best to accept it and let it go. The next time when you are upset about something ask yourself: ”Is it worth disturbing my peace?”
It is a process and daily work to slowly let go of what other people think, but it is also liberating.
We grew up learning to seek the approval of others, to feel accepted and worthy. The truth is that we will never be able to meet other peoples expectations, it is just limiting us and holding us back. It is about breaking free from other people’s expectations and starting to listen to your Soul.
Live your life for YOU and for nobody else.
You don't owe anyone an explanation for what you're doing in your life.
Just go your own way, do the things that feel right for you and stay true to yourself!
3. The time you invest in yourself, is the best investment you can make.
I fell in love with the process of learning about myself and I became very passionate about self-growth and self-discovery. It is one reason why I created this blog, to share my experiences and to inspire and motivate others on their journey.
Our whole life people told us what to do, how we should behave, what is appropriate and what is not. We believe what we have been taught and that it is the only truth. We are living our life, but we always have the feeling that something is missing. The missing piece is the knowledge of ourselves.
We invest so much time in learning about all kinds of things that are outside of ourselves, but we barely invest any time to look inwards.
Self discovery for me, is about questioning everything you have learned and that you think you are. It is about stepping back, starting from zero and being open to everything new as well as questioning your beliefs and discovering where your heart starts to tingle.
I believe, that if you choose your own beliefs and find the things that feel right for you it will give you true meaning to your life. Furthermore, I feel that everybody has unique talents and life is about discovering and embracing them. If you work for something, that you are passionate about and want to share with the world, it will fulfill you on a deeper level.
There is more to life than just the typical eat, work and sleep cycle.
What I love about investing in myself is that, it helps me to change my perspective with challenging situations in my life. I once read the quote: ”You can’t control the events and circumstances, but you can control your reactions to them”. This is so true because you always have a choice on how to react. What comes around, goes around. If you learn to consciously respond instead of unconsciously react, you will make your life way easier. I learned that I always have the choice to perceive a situation in a positive or negative way and the negative way, will never be beneficial for me or the people around me.
Every Experience is a chance to grow and I feel that the Universe is always presenting us with situations that contain a lesson within, even if we often don't want to see the lesson.
These three lessons are based on my experiences and are from my point of view. We all perceive life in a different way and I think it is beautiful to share it. Everybody has something to say and we can learn from each other's experiences.
I am curious what your life lessons are? Share in the comments below xx